Obituaries Are Too Short
As the saying goes, "history is written by the writers."
I think people don't write down their own story nearly often enough. It's often told through a one-page obituary that's mostly major life events like marriage, then a work history, then a list of surviving relatives.
A life is such much bigger than that. A multi-dimensional epic. Deep, nuanced, full of struggle and compromise and transcendence and failure and ideals.
I think people often trust the writing of their story to things like the stories others will tell about them, their record at work, and especially, the values and trajectories of their children. Not enough, I say!
I'm planning a series of essays about people of interest in my life, who have passed away: public figures, family, and so on. Each essay will be titled: "Obituaries Are Too Short: [name of the deceased]".
One of the first essays will be about my grandmother, Nora Culley. She was a single mother who survived the Great Depression and raised two successful men, my father and his brother.
She was a high-school dropout and self-made millionaire, earning her wealth through business ownership, stocks, and real estate. Above is a photo of me and her. She was awesome.
From Sam Fender's song "People Watching" (tinyurl.com/5n6t9chx):
Above the rain-soaked Garden of Remembrance
Kittiwakes etched your initials in the sky
Oh, I fear for this crippled island and the turmoil of the times
And I'll hold you in my heart till the day I die